Nobody loves you when you’re down

These diseases make you unlovable

Nobody loves me when I’m down. And can only see the swarm of darkness closing in on me. My eyes must look so small and bloodshot—fighting to see through bright flashes of light: alarms that never snoozed, constant and jarring.

Nobody recognizes me when I’m breaking. Code, character, promise, or self. My hands must turn into gnarled claws. These that used to build and tickle. Mine that were soft at some point. Now beaten and bloodied, fights that never ceased.

Nobody wants me when I’m dying. And poisoning everything around me. Excuses do not ever mend. Tears in the fabric or rips in the heart. My skin is greening from sickness and internal turmoil. My feet are numbing at the toes and my poor heart is struggling to fill my veins. Sluggish and heavy, aches that never soothed.

Published by Sunshine

Sunny Scape is a safe space for Black women and queer folks. I am committed to eradicating intersecting systems of oppression that overwhelmingly affect people like myself, and doing so in a way that centers the most marginalized of us. That means that I am an activist on behalf of Black and brown queer and trans folks, children, sex workers, disabled folks, people of low socioeconomic status, currently and formerly imprisoned people, and countless others who are pushed to the back burners and relegated to second-class citizenship. This blog and everything within it is absolutely inseparable from the liberation efforts of all the aforementioned groups of people.

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